SaturnFans.com
what's new (beta) - classifieds - forums - photos


Go Back   SaturnFans.com Forums > Models > Saturn S-Series > S-Series General
Register FAQ Members List Groups Calendar Chat Room Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 01-11-2017, 11:21 PM   #2601
dummo
Master Member
dummo is a glorious beacon of lightdummo is a glorious beacon of lightdummo is a glorious beacon of lightdummo is a glorious beacon of lightdummo is a glorious beacon of lightdummo is a glorious beacon of light
 
dummo's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Connecticut
Posts: 2,646
 

1997 SW2
Default Re: Bonehead Saturn Craigslist find of the day

I kinda knew in the back of my mind that they made 2-tone Sedans at some point - apparently in 1993.

http://www.autobidmaster.com/carfind...AGE_PHOENIX_AZ

45298916_01X.JPG

...
1997 SW2 used 12/29/2011 with 124,200 -27 mpg
2004 Ion3 new 11/2003 (totaled) 11/2011 -23 mpg
1994 SL1 new traded
1992 SL2 new traded for above
* 1986 Yamaha ce50 Jog -100 mpg

REWARD EXCELLENCE!

Add to dummo's Reputation
Rate the quality of this post and help dummo reputation points. Click the reputation button near the bottom left corner of this message box. Thank you!
dummo is offline   Reply With Quote
SaturnFans.com Sponsored Links
Old 01-12-2017, 01:56 AM   #2602
madpogue
Super Member
madpogue has much to be proud ofmadpogue has much to be proud ofmadpogue has much to be proud ofmadpogue has much to be proud ofmadpogue has much to be proud ofmadpogue has much to be proud ofmadpogue has much to be proud ofmadpogue has much to be proud of
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Madison, WI USA
Posts: 25,715
 

1996 SW2
Default Re: Bonehead Saturn Craigslist find of the day

So how is this ^^^^^^^ a bonehead? Other than they didn't even bother to clean up the glass.....

REWARD EXCELLENCE!

Add to madpogue's Reputation
Rate the quality of this post and help madpogue reputation points. Click the reputation button near the bottom left corner of this message box. Thank you!
madpogue is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-12-2017, 11:30 AM   #2603
dummo
Master Member
dummo is a glorious beacon of lightdummo is a glorious beacon of lightdummo is a glorious beacon of lightdummo is a glorious beacon of lightdummo is a glorious beacon of lightdummo is a glorious beacon of light
 
dummo's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Connecticut
Posts: 2,646
 

1997 SW2
Default Re: Bonehead Saturn Craigslist find of the day

Mistake. Thought I was in deal of the day. Perhaps I am the Bonehead.

...
1997 SW2 used 12/29/2011 with 124,200 -27 mpg
2004 Ion3 new 11/2003 (totaled) 11/2011 -23 mpg
1994 SL1 new traded
1992 SL2 new traded for above
* 1986 Yamaha ce50 Jog -100 mpg

REWARD EXCELLENCE!

Add to dummo's Reputation
Rate the quality of this post and help dummo reputation points. Click the reputation button near the bottom left corner of this message box. Thank you!
dummo is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-14-2017, 10:52 AM   #2604
trottida
Master Member
trottida has much to be proud oftrottida has much to be proud oftrottida has much to be proud oftrottida has much to be proud oftrottida has much to be proud oftrottida has much to be proud oftrottida has much to be proud oftrottida has much to be proud oftrottida has much to be proud of
 
trottida's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: North of North of Toronto, Northern Ontario, Canada
Posts: 2,739
 

1999 SL2
2001 SL1
Default Re: Bonehead Saturn Craigslist find of the day

I thought there was a thread that documented the questionable Saturn mods found out there. I think there's one specifically for wings and spoilers but I couldn't find it so I just put this here....

http://www.kijiji.ca/v-cars-trucks/m...ationFlag=true



Attached Images
File Type: jpg $_27 (8).JPG (68.0 KB, 211 views)
File Type: jpg $_27b.JPG (60.8 KB, 211 views)

...
1999 SL2 MT (287,130 km @ 10/2019)
2012 Ford Focus SEL HB MT
2011 Suburban LT

Past Saturns
2001 SL1 MT (438,500 km 11y)
1993 SW2 AT (10y)
2001 LW200 MT (3.5y)
1992 SL2 MT (5y)

:canada:

REWARD EXCELLENCE!

Add to trottida's Reputation
Rate the quality of this post and help trottida reputation points. Click the reputation button near the bottom left corner of this message box. Thank you!
trottida is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-14-2017, 10:24 PM   #2605
Jonasan308
Advanced Member
Jonasan308 is a glorious beacon of lightJonasan308 is a glorious beacon of lightJonasan308 is a glorious beacon of lightJonasan308 is a glorious beacon of lightJonasan308 is a glorious beacon of light
 
Jonasan308's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2016
Location: Northeast ohio
Posts: 747
 

1999 SC1
Default Re: Bonehead Saturn Craigslist find of the day

Quote:
Originally Posted by trottida View Post
I thought there was a thread that documented the questionable Saturn mods found out there. I think there's one specifically for wings and spoilers but I couldn't find it so I just put this here....

http://www.kijiji.ca/v-cars-trucks/m...ationFlag=true




heres this monstrosity that i took a pic of in my city. A STOCK corolla with a MASSIVE wing that.... honestly, wont provide any downforce at the speeds that thing is limited to.

But, theres worse. I have a pretty decent contribution to this thread.

REWARD EXCELLENCE!

Add to Jonasan308's Reputation
Rate the quality of this post and help Jonasan308 reputation points. Click the reputation button near the bottom left corner of this message box. Thank you!
Jonasan308 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-14-2017, 10:38 PM   #2606
Jonasan308
Advanced Member
Jonasan308 is a glorious beacon of lightJonasan308 is a glorious beacon of lightJonasan308 is a glorious beacon of lightJonasan308 is a glorious beacon of lightJonasan308 is a glorious beacon of light
 
Jonasan308's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2016
Location: Northeast ohio
Posts: 747
 

1999 SC1
Default Re: Bonehead Saturn Craigslist find of the day



Yep, he cut up a perfectly fine 1st gen s series to laugh at it. I think he sold it.

REWARD EXCELLENCE!

Add to Jonasan308's Reputation
Rate the quality of this post and help Jonasan308 reputation points. Click the reputation button near the bottom left corner of this message box. Thank you!
Jonasan308 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-16-2017, 08:19 PM   #2607
mattwithcats
Senior Member
mattwithcats has a spectacular aura aboutmattwithcats has a spectacular aura aboutmattwithcats has a spectacular aura about
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Virginia
Posts: 1,625

2002 SL2
Default Re: Bonehead Saturn Craigslist find of the day

https://cosprings.craigslist.org/cto/6044609726.html

...
2002 Silver SL2, manual, 5th gear swap (.605), 80,000 miles, black badges,
205/60R15 "H" rated tires, 5mm spacers rear...
Mobil 1 ESP 0W-30, NAPA 41516...
NGK BKR6E-11 spark plugs

REWARD EXCELLENCE!

Add to mattwithcats's Reputation
Rate the quality of this post and help mattwithcats reputation points. Click the reputation button near the bottom left corner of this message box. Thank you!
mattwithcats is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-17-2017, 04:41 PM   #2608
Jonasan308
Advanced Member
Jonasan308 is a glorious beacon of lightJonasan308 is a glorious beacon of lightJonasan308 is a glorious beacon of lightJonasan308 is a glorious beacon of lightJonasan308 is a glorious beacon of light
 
Jonasan308's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2016
Location: Northeast ohio
Posts: 747
 

1999 SC1
Default Re: Bonehead Saturn Craigslist find of the day

I couldnt see too much wrong with that one, other than the price now that i think about it.
Well maintained yes, maybe, but i guess we could doubt the low speed collision thing, since accidents can cause other issues other than blowing up body panels. At less than 50k shy of 400k miles, its impressive but also waaay too much for such a well used car. Id say like 400-500 maybe.

...
1999 SL1-129k at purchase(may 2016)-139k when wrecked(September 2016)
1999 SC1-156K at purchase(oct 2016)-215k(Oct 2019)
1996 SL2-116k- (oct 2019)
Dodging potholes should be a sport

REWARD EXCELLENCE!

Add to Jonasan308's Reputation
Rate the quality of this post and help Jonasan308 reputation points. Click the reputation button near the bottom left corner of this message box. Thank you!
Jonasan308 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-19-2017, 10:19 PM   #2609
GR898SL2
Master Member
GR898SL2 will become famous soon enoughGR898SL2 will become famous soon enough
 
GR898SL2's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: Long Island, NY
Posts: 2,527
Default Re: Bonehead Saturn Craigslist find of the day

Why do people make this mistake? That's an LW300!

https://newyork.craigslist.org/lgi/cto/6048268778.html

The car is fine. It's just not an S-Series. That's what makes it a bonehead find.


...
No more Saturns! :(
'11 & '15 Subaru Forester; '15 Nissan Altima

Last edited by GR898SL2; 03-19-2017 at 10:28 PM..

REWARD EXCELLENCE!

Add to GR898SL2's Reputation
Rate the quality of this post and help GR898SL2 reputation points. Click the reputation button near the bottom left corner of this message box. Thank you!
GR898SL2 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-24-2017, 12:49 PM   #2610
Claybury
Member
Claybury will become famous soon enough
 
Claybury's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2016
Location: Mille Lacs
Posts: 260
Default Re: Bonehead Saturn Craigslist find of the day

https://minneapolis.craigslist.org/w...054451274.html

Well, it has had a lot of trouble shooting.

...
2002 SC2 1.9L
2007 Vue 3.5L
1985 Fiero SE 3.1L
1974 Triumph Spitfire 3.1L V6
2002 Ram duelly diesel 5.9L
1975 Honda PA50 0.05L (Swarm and destroy)

REWARD EXCELLENCE!

Add to Claybury's Reputation
Rate the quality of this post and help Claybury reputation points. Click the reputation button near the bottom left corner of this message box. Thank you!
Claybury is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-25-2017, 03:35 AM   #2611
Jonasan308
Advanced Member
Jonasan308 is a glorious beacon of lightJonasan308 is a glorious beacon of lightJonasan308 is a glorious beacon of lightJonasan308 is a glorious beacon of lightJonasan308 is a glorious beacon of light
 
Jonasan308's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2016
Location: Northeast ohio
Posts: 747
 

1999 SC1
Default Re: Bonehead Saturn Craigslist find of the day

Quote:
Originally Posted by Claybury View Post
https://minneapolis.craigslist.org/w...054451274.html

Well, it has had a lot of trouble shooting.
100 bucks for someones failed car surgery isnt really too bad.

...
1999 SL1-129k at purchase(may 2016)-139k when wrecked(September 2016)
1999 SC1-156K at purchase(oct 2016)-215k(Oct 2019)
1996 SL2-116k- (oct 2019)
Dodging potholes should be a sport

REWARD EXCELLENCE!

Add to Jonasan308's Reputation
Rate the quality of this post and help Jonasan308 reputation points. Click the reputation button near the bottom left corner of this message box. Thank you!
Jonasan308 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-27-2017, 05:13 PM   #2612
Jonasan308
Advanced Member
Jonasan308 is a glorious beacon of lightJonasan308 is a glorious beacon of lightJonasan308 is a glorious beacon of lightJonasan308 is a glorious beacon of lightJonasan308 is a glorious beacon of light
 
Jonasan308's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2016
Location: Northeast ohio
Posts: 747
 

1999 SC1
Default Re: Bonehead Saturn Craigslist find of the day

Here's a good one.

This one is bad. He tossed racing seats in an AUTOMATIC SL1 that barely hauls itself to 60. And then the price. 2500 is way too much for a 148K 98 sl1. Regardless of how many tasteless mods you make to the car.
If the car really actually doesnt burn oil, then thats a very good thing, meaning it was well taken care of. However, i still dont think its worth that much. I really hope no one buys that.

...
1999 SL1-129k at purchase(may 2016)-139k when wrecked(September 2016)
1999 SC1-156K at purchase(oct 2016)-215k(Oct 2019)
1996 SL2-116k- (oct 2019)
Dodging potholes should be a sport

REWARD EXCELLENCE!

Add to Jonasan308's Reputation
Rate the quality of this post and help Jonasan308 reputation points. Click the reputation button near the bottom left corner of this message box. Thank you!
Jonasan308 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-28-2017, 06:54 PM   #2613
dummo
Master Member
dummo is a glorious beacon of lightdummo is a glorious beacon of lightdummo is a glorious beacon of lightdummo is a glorious beacon of lightdummo is a glorious beacon of lightdummo is a glorious beacon of light
 
dummo's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Connecticut
Posts: 2,646
 

1997 SW2
Default Re: Bonehead Saturn Craigslist find of the day

Quote:
Originally Posted by Claybury View Post
https://minneapolis.craigslist.org/w...054451274.html

Well, it has had a lot of trouble shooting.
Ohh, 'troubleshooting'

...
1997 SW2 used 12/29/2011 with 124,200 -27 mpg
2004 Ion3 new 11/2003 (totaled) 11/2011 -23 mpg
1994 SL1 new traded
1992 SL2 new traded for above
* 1986 Yamaha ce50 Jog -100 mpg

REWARD EXCELLENCE!

Add to dummo's Reputation
Rate the quality of this post and help dummo reputation points. Click the reputation button near the bottom left corner of this message box. Thank you!
dummo is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-03-2017, 11:53 AM   #2614
SgtDetritus
Member
SgtDetritus has a spectacular aura aboutSgtDetritus has a spectacular aura aboutSgtDetritus has a spectacular aura about
 
SgtDetritus's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Kansas
Posts: 51

1995 L-Series 2.2L Sedan
Default Re: Bonehead Saturn Craigslist find of the day

The following wasn't a saturn ad, but in fairness we found it when looking for a cheap saturn on craigslist. It has since sold, so I couldn't link right to the post, but before it did, I copied the text. It had my whole family crying. Here goes:

1994 Chevy Cavalier- THE UGLIEST HOOPTY ON CRAIGSLIST!!!

First, let's get the obvious out of the way. Yeah, it's ugly. But completely functional. The ugly part is for the rest of the world to worry about, not you. All you'll see is the dash and the open road.

This is an ideal car for any one of several types of situations. If you are down on your luck, your funds, or both, and need wheels, consider this car. Maybe you currently need to walk (or bike) to work or school, and you're facing the prospect of either of those being your only mode of conveyance once the snow flies. This car has your back. It's got a roof and heat, plus a gas sipping V6 and automatic. Of course it is cosmetically challenged, so before pulling the trigger on this deal you may want to consider whether your workplace has an obscured location you can park, such as behind trees, or around the block. Or, if your workplace has a large campus or ships over the road, park it on the other side of buildings, semi trailers or other large obstacles which will hide it from view and ridicule of those who know it's yours.

Parents, have a "bad apple" in your brood? This car makes a better (and more legally defensible in family court) tool for punishment than the pillory, the iron maiden, or marooning on a desert island. Are you miffed at the way your little squirt watched you sign over big bucks to get them a slick new ride, only to find them with their grades slipping, or choosing the wrong friends, or dabbling in sinister substances? Don't let their growing independence to make bad choices hamstring your once effective parenting. Yes, you still have the power to put them in line. Unload that high priced vehicle they no longer deserve, and give them this. They will still be independent, but you won't look like you got run over by them (pun intended).

Or, maybe you have a good kid who "REALLY REALLY REALLY WANTS TO DRIVE, OH PLEASE DAD/MOM, I'LL BE EXTRA CAREFUL, OBEY ALL LAWS AT ALL TIMES, NEVER KEEP THE RADIO SO LOUD I CAN'T PAY ATTENTION, ETC ETC ETC..." But, you're remembering the time they burned their dinner, let an expensive iPod melt in the sun on the dash of your car, and jumped in the pool with a pricey cell phone in their pocket. All in the same day. This car is a perfect solution. It already comes with the dents, so you won't have to worry about how many they add to it. Problem solved.

If you live in a bad neighborhood, this car is perfect. Its age, condition, and styling will do more to deter would-be thieves than any alarm, electronic immobilizer, or locked garage ever could. When your neighbor's choice new shiny ride gets snagged by the bad guys, you can just smile and know this vehicle is safe. You're welcome.

On a related note, are you worried about getting a pricey radio stolen? Not with this car, it just has a big hole where one used to be. Imagine the perturbed looks on those would-be thieves' faces when they have to move on and choose a different vehicle's tunebox to boost. Curses, foiled again! If you are the type who has to have jams while you drive, it will take a creative personality to drive this car. If you don't know what I'm talking about, go back and rewatch the "Mockingbird" scene from Dumb and Dumber. System of a Down fan? Leave those CD's at home and practice up on your angry screaming. Want to rock out to Led Zeppelin? Load up on some hard drugs, start "flogging your log", and see how high your voice will go. Just not while driving. You're still going to need one hand to steer and one to shift. Love rap music? Maybe this is the time to go get those beatboxing lessons you've been putting off for so long. Country fan? Channel every bit of heartbreak you've ever felt in your life, and hold it in your vocal cords for just a second or two. Then, open wide and belt out that twang. Opera fan? You're on your own, I can't help you there.

Let's be honest, you clicked on an ad for a $500 car because you are frugal and know the value of a dollar, and may not be sitting on too many of them. What can a $500 car do for you? Save a lot on car payments, that's what. Most new ones will cost around $250 PER MONTH. But you're smarter than that. You know that if the car lasts 6 months or a year, you'll be $1500, or $3000, ahead. Being the first buyer to "Take it out of the wrapper" with zero miles doesn't trip your trigger. This one has 165,000. It's a proven car. No need to worry about things breaking in the first 5,000 miles of "teething problems". You know the way those flashy new autos depreciate like a stone the minute you drive them off the lot. If this car had depreciated any more, I'd be giving it to you!! This car pertly snubs the idea that fancy new sheetmetal is a worthwhile cash investment. You'll save yours for more important things like groceries, rent and clothes. Further, you, savvy consumer, are not swayed by that pricey "New Car Smell". You aren't bothered by the innumerable pets which have been in this car, the handful of cigarettes smoked in it, and the hundreds of cheeseburgers eaten in it. It's probably been farted in a few times, but who's counting? A little Febreeze and it'll air out, I promise!

What else is there to really say? Many of you have not read this far down the ad and are already on your way here to make it yours. But for those still reading who want to know more about the car, we can begin with the obvious and work our way down from there. It is grey primer. Think of it as he perfect blank canvas for any paint job you want to put on it. The corners of the car are crunched from a wreck on the ice, but only the sheetmetal took the hit. The functional parts of the car are fine. It does need a headlight and tail light replaced, which are cheap at the U-Pull yard, or if you want to negotiate for me to pick them up and me to put them in I can. The trunk leaks water though, so you will want to keep the things that need to stay dry in the back seat. It's just one of those minor peccadillos that separates a $500 car from a $30,000 one. The front tires are new, rears are good. It does not leak oil and the CV shafts are good. The last owner took fastidious care of it mechanically. I have the keys and the title, clean. In summary it is one of those functional, point A to B kind of cars. Better than hoofin' it on your own two feet, bumming rides from your friends, or inconveniencing your parents for a ride in "Mom's Taxi".

If the descriptions of the mechanical condition in that last paragraph are over your head, they can be simply summarized in one sentence. Yes, this car "works".

Obviously the rear bumper fell off, the hubcaps vamoose'd years ago, and it needs a headlight and taillight. Sure the red tape on the taillight looks tacky (honestly, what household material on a vehicle doesn't), but think of the cool stories you could come up with to explain the crash damage. Like, that time an alien spaceship broke up in midair over you and you had to swerve to avoid a debris chunk. Or that camping trip to the mountains when those hungry bears just HAD TO HAVE your oatmeal cream pies you left inside, and pushed the car over a cliff to gain access, but the car was such a legend that it survived the plummet for you to drive it home.

Other than that, I can't really think of anything this car is missing, except, BUMPER STICKERS. Whether your tasteful modesty leads you to put on just one, or you go whole hog and plaster the entire trunk and back window, let me offer a few suggestions. There is the timeless "Don't laugh, it's paid for". For the religious types among you, the ever popular "Never mind the car, my treasure is in heaven". For the non-religious types, "What the hell, it runs!" And for those of an equine background, the tongue-in-cheek "If this car were a horse I'd have to shoot it". And who can't forget the timeless "Make my day. Steal this car!"

Hope I made someone's day

...
Rest in Peace, Yoda :-(
Green 97 SL2 named Yoda...When 266,000 miles you reach, look as good you will not.

REWARD EXCELLENCE!

Add to SgtDetritus's Reputation
Rate the quality of this post and help SgtDetritus reputation points. Click the reputation button near the bottom left corner of this message box. Thank you!
SgtDetritus is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-03-2017, 11:56 AM   #2615
SgtDetritus
Member
SgtDetritus has a spectacular aura aboutSgtDetritus has a spectacular aura aboutSgtDetritus has a spectacular aura about
 
SgtDetritus's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Kansas
Posts: 51

1995 L-Series 2.2L Sedan
Default Re: Bonehead Saturn Craigslist find of the day

The following wasn't a saturn ad, but in fairness we found it when looking for a cheap saturn on craigslist. I copied the text. It had my whole family crying. Here goes:

1994 Chevy Cavalier- THE UGLIEST HOOPTY ON CRAIGSLIST!!!

First, let's get the obvious out of the way. Yeah, it's ugly. But completely functional. The ugly part is for the rest of the world to worry about, not you. All you'll see is the dash and the open road.

This is an ideal car for any one of several types of situations. If you are down on your luck, your funds, or both, and need wheels, consider this car. Maybe you currently need to walk (or bike) to work or school, and you're facing the prospect of either of those being your only mode of conveyance once the snow flies. This car has your back. It's got a roof and heat, plus a gas sipping V6 and automatic. Of course it is cosmetically challenged, so before pulling the trigger on this deal you may want to consider whether your workplace has an obscured location you can park, such as behind trees, or around the block. Or, if your workplace has a large campus or ships over the road, park it on the other side of buildings, semi trailers or other large obstacles which will hide it from view and ridicule of those who know it's yours.

Parents, have a "bad apple" in your brood? This car makes a better (and more legally defensible in family court) tool for punishment than the pillory, the iron maiden, or marooning on a desert island. Are you miffed at the way your little squirt watched you sign over big bucks to get them a slick new ride, only to find them with their grades slipping, or choosing the wrong friends, or dabbling in sinister substances? Don't let their growing independence to make bad choices hamstring your once effective parenting. Yes, you still have the power to put them in line. Unload that high priced vehicle they no longer deserve, and give them this. They will still be independent, but you won't look like you got run over by them (pun intended).

Or, maybe you have a good kid who "REALLY REALLY REALLY WANTS TO DRIVE, OH PLEASE DAD/MOM, I'LL BE EXTRA CAREFUL, OBEY ALL LAWS AT ALL TIMES, NEVER KEEP THE RADIO SO LOUD I CAN'T PAY ATTENTION, ETC ETC ETC..." But, you're remembering the time they burned their dinner, let an expensive iPod melt in the sun on the dash of your car, and jumped in the pool with a pricey cell phone in their pocket. All in the same day. This car is a perfect solution. It already comes with the dents, so you won't have to worry about how many they add to it. Problem solved.

If you live in a bad neighborhood, this car is perfect. Its age, condition, and styling will do more to deter would-be thieves than any alarm, electronic immobilizer, or locked garage ever could. When your neighbor's choice new shiny ride gets snagged by the bad guys, you can just smile and know this vehicle is safe. You're welcome.

On a related note, are you worried about getting a pricey radio stolen? Not with this car, it just has a big hole where one used to be. Imagine the perturbed looks on those would-be thieves' faces when they have to move on and choose a different vehicle's tunebox to boost. Curses, foiled again! If you are the type who has to have jams while you drive, it will take a creative personality to drive this car. If you don't know what I'm talking about, go back and rewatch the "Mockingbird" scene from Dumb and Dumber. System of a Down fan? Leave those CD's at home and practice up on your angry screaming. Want to rock out to Led Zeppelin? Load up on some hard drugs, start "flogging your log", and see how high your voice will go. Just not while driving. You're still going to need one hand to steer and one to shift. Love rap music? Maybe this is the time to go get those beatboxing lessons you've been putting off for so long. Country fan? Channel every bit of heartbreak you've ever felt in your life, and hold it in your vocal cords for just a second or two. Then, open wide and belt out that twang. Opera fan? You're on your own, I can't help you there.

Let's be honest, you clicked on an ad for a $500 car because you are frugal and know the value of a dollar, and may not be sitting on too many of them. What can a $500 car do for you? Save a lot on car payments, that's what. Most new ones will cost around $250 PER MONTH. But you're smarter than that. You know that if the car lasts 6 months or a year, you'll be $1500, or $3000, ahead. Being the first buyer to "Take it out of the wrapper" with zero miles doesn't trip your trigger. This one has 165,000. It's a proven car. No need to worry about things breaking in the first 5,000 miles of "teething problems". You know the way those flashy new autos depreciate like a stone the minute you drive them off the lot. If this car had depreciated any more, I'd be giving it to you!! This car pertly snubs the idea that fancy new sheetmetal is a worthwhile cash investment. You'll save yours for more important things like groceries, rent and clothes. Further, you, savvy consumer, are not swayed by that pricey "New Car Smell". You aren't bothered by the innumerable pets which have been in this car, the handful of cigarettes smoked in it, and the hundreds of cheeseburgers eaten in it. It's probably been farted in a few times, but who's counting? A little Febreeze and it'll air out, I promise!

What else is there to really say? Many of you have not read this far down the ad and are already on your way here to make it yours. But for those still reading who want to know more about the car, we can begin with the obvious and work our way down from there. It is grey primer. Think of it as he perfect blank canvas for any paint job you want to put on it. The corners of the car are crunched from a wreck on the ice, but only the sheetmetal took the hit. The functional parts of the car are fine. It does need a headlight and tail light replaced, which are cheap at the U-Pull yard, or if you want to negotiate for me to pick them up and me to put them in I can. The trunk leaks water though, so you will want to keep the things that need to stay dry in the back seat. It's just one of those minor peccadillos that separates a $500 car from a $30,000 one. The front tires are new, rears are good. It does not leak oil and the CV shafts are good. The last owner took fastidious care of it mechanically. I have the keys and the title, clean. In summary it is one of those functional, point A to B kind of cars. Better than hoofin' it on your own two feet, bumming rides from your friends, or inconveniencing your parents for a ride in "Mom's Taxi".

If the descriptions of the mechanical condition in that last paragraph are over your head, they can be simply summarized in one sentence. Yes, this car "works".

Obviously the rear bumper fell off, the hubcaps vamoose'd years ago, and it needs a headlight and taillight. Sure the red tape on the taillight looks tacky (honestly, what household material on a vehicle doesn't), but think of the cool stories you could come up with to explain the crash damage. Like, that time an alien spaceship broke up in midair over you and you had to swerve to avoid a debris chunk. Or that camping trip to the mountains when those hungry bears just HAD TO HAVE your oatmeal cream pies you left inside, and pushed the car over a cliff to gain access, but the car was such a legend that it survived the plummet for you to drive it home.

Other than that, I can't really think of anything this car is missing, except, BUMPER STICKERS. Whether your tasteful modesty leads you to put on just one, or you go whole hog and plaster the entire trunk and back window, let me offer a few suggestions. There is the timeless "Don't laugh, it's paid for". For the religious types among you, the ever popular "Never mind the car, my treasure is in heaven". For the non-religious types, "What the hell, it runs!" And for those of an equine background, the tongue-in-cheek "If this car were a horse I'd have to shoot it". And who can't forget the timeless "Make my day. Steal this car!"

Hope I made someone's day

...
Rest in Peace, Yoda :-(
Green 97 SL2 named Yoda...When 266,000 miles you reach, look as good you will not.

REWARD EXCELLENCE!

Add to SgtDetritus's Reputation
Rate the quality of this post and help SgtDetritus reputation points. Click the reputation button near the bottom left corner of this message box. Thank you!
SgtDetritus is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-13-2017, 02:38 AM   #2616
colonelhogan44
Master Member
colonelhogan44 is a glorious beacon of lightcolonelhogan44 is a glorious beacon of lightcolonelhogan44 is a glorious beacon of lightcolonelhogan44 is a glorious beacon of lightcolonelhogan44 is a glorious beacon of light
 
colonelhogan44's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Central Valley, CA
Posts: 2,004
 

1998 SL2
Default Re: Bonehead Saturn Craigslist find of the day

https://fresno.craigslist.org/pts/6077778581.html

Selling whole car for parts $500 no paper work...Can be liened though, xlnt eng and trans custom dual exhaust good tires,text or call 559-397-2908
Attached Images
File Type: jpg 00F0F_7LB4e5LvV90_600x450.jpg (38.4 KB, 24 views)
File Type: jpg 00R0R_lRzpAVrV3YG_600x450.jpg (34.2 KB, 10 views)
File Type: jpg 00y0y_7wHJi8m2qvd_600x450.jpg (34.0 KB, 14 views)
File Type: jpg 00G0G_6EbI6fUSLtx_600x450.jpg (41.1 KB, 10 views)
File Type: jpg 00t0t_eKMU4giKUQj_600x450.jpg (29.6 KB, 13 views)
File Type: jpg 00a0a_lUbtVzlWkSn_600x450.jpg (24.6 KB, 9 views)

...
MechE - I make things!

EGR ADAPTERS AVAILABLE! $30 "reverse" $40 standard

1998 SL2 (gone, never forgotten)
2005 Volvo S40 T5 AWD
1987 Mercedes 300D
1993 Tracker 4x4
1996 Tracker 4x4

REWARD EXCELLENCE!

Add to colonelhogan44's Reputation
Rate the quality of this post and help colonelhogan44 reputation points. Click the reputation button near the bottom left corner of this message box. Thank you!
colonelhogan44 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-13-2017, 04:14 AM   #2617
madpogue
Super Member
madpogue has much to be proud ofmadpogue has much to be proud ofmadpogue has much to be proud ofmadpogue has much to be proud ofmadpogue has much to be proud ofmadpogue has much to be proud ofmadpogue has much to be proud ofmadpogue has much to be proud of
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Madison, WI USA
Posts: 25,715
 

1996 SW2
Default Re: Bonehead Saturn Craigslist find of the day

^^^^ A grand slam, triple crown, Super Bowl, world series sweep all in one. DEF. worth preserving the photos; that wing.....

REWARD EXCELLENCE!

Add to madpogue's Reputation
Rate the quality of this post and help madpogue reputation points. Click the reputation button near the bottom left corner of this message box. Thank you!
madpogue is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-15-2017, 10:32 PM   #2618
Jonasan308
Advanced Member
Jonasan308 is a glorious beacon of lightJonasan308 is a glorious beacon of lightJonasan308 is a glorious beacon of lightJonasan308 is a glorious beacon of lightJonasan308 is a glorious beacon of light
 
Jonasan308's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2016
Location: Northeast ohio
Posts: 747
 

1999 SC1
Default Re: Bonehead Saturn Craigslist find of the day

Its got all those tacky race mods, and its a SOHC. It doesnt even have a manual trans. Ewww.
On the plus side.... thats a very pretty color on that car.

...
1999 SL1-129k at purchase(may 2016)-139k when wrecked(September 2016)
1999 SC1-156K at purchase(oct 2016)-215k(Oct 2019)
1996 SL2-116k- (oct 2019)
Dodging potholes should be a sport

REWARD EXCELLENCE!

Add to Jonasan308's Reputation
Rate the quality of this post and help Jonasan308 reputation points. Click the reputation button near the bottom left corner of this message box. Thank you!
Jonasan308 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-01-2017, 12:08 PM   #2619
Jonasan308
Advanced Member
Jonasan308 is a glorious beacon of lightJonasan308 is a glorious beacon of lightJonasan308 is a glorious beacon of lightJonasan308 is a glorious beacon of lightJonasan308 is a glorious beacon of light
 
Jonasan308's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2016
Location: Northeast ohio
Posts: 747
 

1999 SC1
Default Re: Bonehead Saturn Craigslist find of the day

Found this. Its not a saturn. But its another GM made car so who cares. I didnt know chevy made a grand prix.


Its glaringly obvious this person knows nothing about the car they are selling other than what its called (BIG MOTOR) and probably means they filled it with 87 instead of the 91 that those kinds of cars need.
With 102k and being the GTP, it could fetch more.

...
1999 SL1-129k at purchase(may 2016)-139k when wrecked(September 2016)
1999 SC1-156K at purchase(oct 2016)-215k(Oct 2019)
1996 SL2-116k- (oct 2019)
Dodging potholes should be a sport

Last edited by Jonasan308; 06-01-2017 at 12:19 PM..

REWARD EXCELLENCE!

Add to Jonasan308's Reputation
Rate the quality of this post and help Jonasan308 reputation points. Click the reputation button near the bottom left corner of this message box. Thank you!
Jonasan308 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-10-2017, 09:55 AM   #2620
onlinebiker
Advanced Member
onlinebiker is a glorious beacon of lightonlinebiker is a glorious beacon of lightonlinebiker is a glorious beacon of lightonlinebiker is a glorious beacon of lightonlinebiker is a glorious beacon of lightonlinebiker is a glorious beacon of light
 
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: sw michigan
Posts: 995
Default Re: Bonehead Saturn Craigslist find of the day

Found a real " optimist" here, and he's only a few miles from me...

He has a 02 SC1 for "only $6000". Tomorrow I might swap plates over to my 02 SC2, that I paid 1600 for (rust free) and go burst this moron's bubble.


https://kalamazoo.craigslist.org/cto...292831013.html

Fun part - mine's red too.

...
92 SC2
93 SC2
96 SC2
97 SL2
97 SC2
99 SC2
01 SC2 x 2 yellow
02 SC2
02 SL2
parts
2 94 SC2 parted out
2 96 SC2
98 SC2 - rusty frame minus engine.

REWARD EXCELLENCE!

Add to onlinebiker's Reputation
Rate the quality of this post and help onlinebiker reputation points. Click the reputation button near the bottom left corner of this message box. Thank you!
onlinebiker is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply



Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Craigslist find of the day blackeagle1 S-Series General 11 08-18-2009 07:16 PM
Craigslist find of the day! TvSteve S-Series General 11 07-10-2009 12:47 PM
Craigslist Find of the Day 2NDSOUT S-Series Tech 4 05-08-2009 09:20 PM
Strange find on Craigslist!!! TvSteve S-Series General 3 02-07-2009 08:56 PM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 07:48 AM.

Advanced Forum Search | Advanced Photo Search


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2020, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
SaturnFans.com. The Saturn Enthusiasts Site.